Sometimes There Are Moments in Life That Just Make More Sense With Tears

I was laying in the hospital bed waiting for James to sign me out. Finally, I get to go home, well Jelly's home. I'm staying with her because it's more "handicapped accessible". Doc says I'll be on crutches for a while and I would have gone home a while ago, but we had to wait til my shoulder was well enough to support myself on crutches, considering I can't sit in a wheel chair.
I heard someone approaching, and expected it to be James, but instead it was Kit. Being someone I didn't expect, my welcome came out more as a "why are you here." oops. She looked like she was in the mood for a serious conversation.
I asked er what was wrong, but she said that I should start do the talking first. So I told her about the conversation I had with James the other day and how I feel that a marriage could be very near in my future. Of course, that sent Kit bouncing off walls and throwing all these ideas in to my mind.
"Kit calm down. It's more of an idea than it is a decision right now." I said, hopefully dimming her spirits so she'd calm down.
"Oh Dimitri, I know it's going to happen." She winked than plopped down in the chair next to me.
It was time for her to start talking, but I felt like I had to force it out of her.
She told me how Grandma Liz took her to the doctor, and how he didn't have many positive things to say about her. Then she went on about how she thought she was pregnant and decided to leave me panicking for a moment till she finally told me the test was negative.
And there was something she mentioned about just wanting to end it all. She turned her head trying to hide her tears from me. I grabbed her hand,
"Kitty, we can't be strong all the time, there are just some moments in life that make more sense with tears." I told her.
She looked over and smiled as I tried my best to crack a joke.
Then she got into it about the wedding and her life with TwoBit, "I love him more than anything, but... I'm just...scared." She said.
I tugged on her hand and she snuggled up next to me. I ran my fingers through her hair, "Being scared is a natural feeling, there's nothing wrong with that. I know you love TwoBit more than anything. An idiot can see that. Marriage is just an act, but love is a feeling, it's what makes a marriage what it is, without it a marriage would be nothing."
"You know, for never being married, you sure do have a lot to say about it."
"But I am in love." I convinced.
She just laid there a moment till her tears stopped and I heard her whisper "Thanks for listening, I really needed that."
"Anytime Kit. Anytime."



After she left, I was dwelling on something she said earlier.....End it all? As in your life? I had so much that I should have said but didn't, and I don't know what held me back, but when she left I pulled out a sheet of paper and started writing.


Kitty,

I know sometime we go through things that aren't exactly what we would choose, but those things only make us stronger and prepare us for what's to come. Life isn't perfect, if it was, the perfect moments we have wouldn't mean the same to us. You can't have love without hatred, and you can't have joy without suffering, it's how the world works. You just have to dwell on those good moments and know that the best has yet to come, and you're never alone. You have a man that loves you and wouldn't think twice about it. You have the two best friends in the world, if I do say so myself. We're always here for you to fall back on, it makes our relationships stronger. You'll get through this, because getting through it is the only way out of it. Love you Kitty,
-Dim