The things I love most about Angelica Winston!

Really I just felt like writing a super long post....no, like a Kit long post XD, so we'll see how it turns out...

Elena's back from North Carolina finally. She went with her ex Jake who she recently got back together with...as long is his name isn't Bob, I couldn't care less who she is with at the moment. A year ago, back when we lived in California, I hated Jake. He knocked up my sister, but seeing how gorgeous and joyful that little girl is, makes me proud to be an uncle at age twenty. Jasalin is a year old now and Elena went to get here in North Carolina to bring here back here with us. I found out that Elena hasn't been eating. I placed two fingers around her wrist and if I squeezed I swear her tiny little wrist would have snapped. She said she doesn't know why she hasn't been eating, she just says she can't and then she gets all emotional and cries about it. She passed out in the living room floor. It seems like I'm always worried about her in some way. Her life is always in fast forward. She never slows down.
Even when I'm out having a great time with Jelly, I constantly find myself worrying about Elena. I swear it's not healthy. I was born as her older brother... so why the hell do I have to act as her dad?
When I'm not worrying about Elena, I'm thinking about Jelly.
Our two months is only days away, and I have to constantly remind myself it's only been two months. Sometimes I think what would have happened if I didn't have that party? Would we be where we are now? Together?
I first saw Jelly when she and Kit came to hang at the DX with Soda just after I was hired. She strutted up in her dark skinny jeans and a blue baseball t-shirt. I remember thinking how pretty she was. I also remember not shutting up about her after they left ha ha. I think Soda got annoyed. I can honestly say without having to think or hesitate, that Jelly is truly the best thing to ever exist in my life. I do have to give some credit to the greatness of Kitty. If it wasn't for her sort of setting me and Jels up, I don't know if I ever would have asked Jelly out. Of course I wanted to, but wanting and doing are two very different things. Thanks so much Kit, because if it weren't for your divine eager and outgoing personality, I would be alone amongst everything I have to deal with right now.
Jelly and I were lying outside the other night. We didn't talk much this time, we just enjoyed the presence of each other. I remember just thinking about her. I came up with a top 5 list of the things I love most about Jelly...

5. She is so full of life and energy, she keeps me going when I rather just give up.

4. Her beauty is not only an outward appearance, it sinks deep within her, she's so pure and genuine.

3. I could be in the shittiest mood possible, on the verge of wanting to rot in a muddy ditch, but when she walks in the room... I'm drowning in a sea of joy and all thing pleasing.

2. She's real. She loves being only herself...which I love because nobody can be a better her.

1. The number one thing I love about Jelly..... is the way she makes me feel.

I laid there thinking about all of this, and doing some narrowing down because there is definitely a much longer list that goes way beyond this.
Today I was playing with Jasalin, and in her adorable little baby talk, she said "Dim, you gonna marray Jel-Jel?" The first thought I had was what the hell do you say to a one year old when they ask a question like that? But later on I thought about it... it's only been two months...that's too soon....right? But I realized other obstacles bigger than time.
I work at a gas station on a low income, I'm too busy and focused on Elena's mischief, I'm only twenty. Jelly deserves better than that... she deserves someone who can undoubtedly support her. Someone who has to focus and worry and protect and is 100 percent devoted to only her. I pondered on this one year old's question... in a few years, I can definitely see myself marryinhttp://www.blogger.com/g Jelly. I love her, she makes unbelievably happy, but she deserves more than I can give her right now. So until then, I guess I'll just have to dwell on the things I love most about Angelica Winston.

Memories of a WILD night

We had a party the other night, because many of us wanted an excuse to get totally wasted...well we did. Hardly any of us remember a thing, but apparently we took a lot of pictures so here is a few......



Elena & Bree XD





Emily & Angela




Dallas


MORE PICS ON FACEBOOK!!!

My Girlfriend's Grandma

Jelly's grandmother came to town, I've hard stories and rumors and honestly, I was a little scared.
We started with dinner at Jelly's house Tuesday night. Her Dad and her cooked, and she invited me over. I dressed up and showed up on her doorstep with a single rose at 6 o'clock. I handed Jels the rose and the first thing her grandmother said to me was "I think a man with a single rose is one of the sexiest things i have ever seen." Coming from a...... much older woman, I had no idea how to react to that, but I guess it was a good first impression.
We sat down for dinner and I sat between Jels and her grandmother. A few minutes into dinner her grandmother says "Angelica eat more meat, your so flat chested, you want to please your man don't you?" Honestly, I had to hold back a laugh. LOL. Jelly was red XD.
"It's not like that grandma..." Jelly said.
"What.. how long have you been dating?" asked grandma.
"A little over a month..." Jels answered.
Grandma Winston turned to me and said, almost shouting "And you haven't fucked her yet?"
I'm pretty sure Jelly's food fell out of her mouth, and I was still having to keep myself from laughing.
"NO Grandma! Actually Dimitri's saving himself..." Jelly explained.
"For who? Demi Moore?" she said sarcastically.
"I just want it to be... right. I believe it's not just for anyone, it's for someone special." I informed, leaving out some...truth.
Grandma Winston just sighed and told me how I was apparently missing out ha ha.

By dessert time, I almost peed myself laughing at least a dozen times.
We were having a somewhat good time, i guess and we were all laughing. I took a bite of cheesecake when I felt.... someone...grab me... under the table. I almost chocked on my cake. It was grandma Winston. I made a funny noise, catching Jelly's attention. "You okay?" she asked softly.
All I did was nod, wide-eyed.

I started to leave after dessert.
"Don't be a stranger good-looking. You better come by and see me before I leave!!!" demanded Grandma.
Jelly and I stood on the porch,
"She groped you under the table didn't she?"
"Yup" I said nodding, still a bit shocked.
"Oh god" Jels sighed, "I'm really sorry."
I started laughing "I can't hold you accountable for your grandmother's actions."
We sat on the porch steps for a while talking, mostly about how much Jelly misses Kit, after all they are best friends. But a little while later she caught me by suprise...
"I respect you for the whole saving yourself thing you know?" Jelly said.
"I know babe. Im not exactly waiting for marriage, just...the right moment...with the right person, and i'm not saying that your not the right person...it's just..." I paused...
"What is it Dim?...... What made you decide that?" she asked.
She had a right to know, I trust Jelly with everything that I am. Someone I cared about that much, had a right to know everything about me.
She was stroking my hand while she leaned on my chest.
"You know that my mom used to beat me when I was younger....and Elena too."
"Yeah, you told me that" she said.
"Well.......she didn't just beat me Jels, sometimes.....she.......would rape me."
Jelly was shocked, but to be honest, I'm glad she knew the truth.
"So... I don't want it to be wasted again....or taken from me." I finished.
Jelly was speechless, she didn't even look at me, until I said...
"I've never told anyone that before."
Then she turned to face me. I thought she was about to cry. The she said something else I was also taken surprise by. She stared at me for a while, and then she said
"I love you."
I leaned in, and passionately kissed her. Personally I would have liked to have said that to her first, but I did the next best thing...
"I love you too."

Broken & Betrayed

Usually when you think about someone's heart being broken, it's from a Boy/girl friend or a wanna be girl/boy friend. People never really think about they're own family breaking their heart, and for those of you who have had your heart broken, you know it doesn't break even.... it breaks ridged.

It started last week. So much has happened since then, it's almost a blur now.
Elena was out one night and I was home hanging with Jelly. I started to hear screaming, so I stepped outside and noticed Elena at the vacant lot, surrounded by socs. I immediately broke into a sprint for the curtis house and banged on the front door. Soda answered, and Dallas was over so them and Darry followed me to the vacant lot. Twelve socs for us isn't all that difficult, it just takes a little time. Bob pulled a gun on Elena and shot her in the back of her shoulder. I hovered over Elena trying to get her to wake up when I heard Soda yell something and then felt a glass bottle bust over my head.
I woke up in Jelly's arms. We were at her house and her dad was treating Elena. I sat up almost falling back over again. We had to take Elena to the hospital. We found that there was a little nerve damage but that she would be okay. She had to stay over night though and Jelly's dad wouldn't let me stay with her cause I had a concussion and my head was bleeding. Jelly made me go to sleep as soon as I got home, and she slept next to me because she had to wake me up every two hours because the concussion anyways.
Elena came home a few days later. I swear the girl never stops, she just keeps going and going. She wanted to go to her "hideout" but I wouldn't let her go alone in her condition so her, Jels, and I went to the hideout. I started up the fireplace and we goofed around playing truth or dare and what not. Between all the daring, we ended up outside in the lake. A little while later Elena had one of her famous melt downs. I cant blame her though, she has quite a troubled past. She told me how mom used to beat her. I wasn't surprised, because, well Mom used to beat me too. I was half expecting Elena to tell me what else mom did to her, but she didn't, so I noticed that Elena was a bit luckier than I was....she was never....

"I can still feel where he hurt me Dimitri" she said referring to the incident in California almost two years ago. She was cut up pretty bad from that, especially her back.
I sat there holding her, "It's okay Elena. He's gone, he won't ever hurt you again, i made sure of it."
"How?" she asked
"I can't tell you." I told her. I wasn't proud of what I did to ensure her safety, it was sick and cruel, but I had to do it..... for her.
She stopped crying after a while and we went back inside. Later we heard a knock on the door. Elena answered it and asked me and Jelly to go in the other room.
Somehow Jels and I end up locked in the bedroom, and Elena is outside with a stranger. After a while she texts me saying where the key is and that Jels and I will have a night alone on the hideout. I thought, what the hell, let her do her thing. Jelly and I left early the next morning but Elena wasnt at the house. The sun was setting and I still hadn't heard from her so I drove back up to the hideout. Elena answered the door and I noticed that she was not alone, standing behind her was ... BOB!
"What the hell is he doing here Elena?" I said shouting, then I noticed they were both half dressed.
"Are you fucking kidding me??" I couldn't believe it.
There was a lot of yelling after that and by the end I was pissed.
"Open your fucking eyes, Do you know what he's done Elena? To you? To Soda, our friends?" I tried to swing one at Bob but Elena stopped me. I couldn't believe this was happening. I turned to leave but just before I did, I said one more thing.
"We can't both exists like this in your life Elena." I pointed at Bob, "I'm not going to do that to Soda, to the gang. You have to choose.... me or him?"

So far, it's been HIM!